Life and Time
by symphonySketch
Summary: You never thought time mattered until now, when that's all you found yourself thinking about. (an arafef fic for tumblr user thoughts-and-bubbles, originally posted on my tumblr lehstrad.)


The dream bubbles are vast and endless. After getting them set up you've spent quite a long time floating around through them, you don't know exactly how long anymore. Time doesn't really matter here. The dream bubbles are usually empty of life, since they were meant to house the souls of your deceased friends afterall. Though you do run into a few living trolls and humans. You're quite sure they're going to die or have already died in another timeline. But that's okay, life is pretty meaningless when you can still 'live' on as a ghost in a cluster of memories and dreams. After you died you thought about all that has happened in your session. You had a lot of fun with your friends and hanging with sollux was great. Even the few moments you and eridan talked we're nice. However, you are quite content with being alone, in fact you think this was just the thing you needed. Some peace and quiet. You still do enjoy running into your friends in the bubbles. The few passing moments you've shared with them each time were filled with laughter and joy. Calm at seeing a familiar face, relief at the easy flowing conversation, and content with their fate. Every time you leave a bubble to visit another, you leave with the knowledge that you have helped them accept their new 'life'. And that's just grand.! You're glad knowing that even though they are dead, they'll still be ok. "Everything will Be fine!" you often tell them. And they trust you, which makes you glad. You enjoy helpi- You are broken from your thoughts when you hear a loud, excited voice.

"feferi!"  
You look up to see aradia coming your way.  
She looks…different. And alive. Every single aradia you've passed by was an aradiabot, buoy were there plenty of her here! Oh, she's made it to god tier. You wonder how that happened, and if she's still alive then you wonder how everyone else is doing, who's still alive in her timeline? Your mind is flooded with questions. Whale, its not like you have anything better to do, and it's been a while since you've chatted with anyone.  
"feferi, it's so good to see you.!"  
"hey aradia! What brings you here?"  
"oh I was just passing by and I saw you sitting here so I thought I'd come over and chat for a bit. If that's alright with you, that is." she said with a sheepish grin. Now that you think about it, you two hardly talked when you were both living. Maybe you can make up for that now.  
"yeah! That's fin, it's been a while since I've talked to someone so yeah this is exshellent!" you can't wait to hear what she has to say. Sometimes your friends usually have a great story about their timeline when you visit them.  
"great! So what have you been up to? I can't imagine there's much to do here..?" she asked as she sat by you.  
"no not reely, it's kind of a bore here but I guess it's better than being non existent or floating off somewhere in limbo! Besides, I can at least visit everyone and hang out with them in their memories. That's pretty swell!"  
"yeah, I've caught up with a few of our friends, it is pretty swell. I'm Glad they're doing good here, most of them seem happier now then when they were alive." she smiled fondly. It was sincere and she looked lovely. You briefly thought that it would be nice if she smiled like that more often. Most of your memories of her, she always had a neutral expression and when she was a robot, her eyes were even colder and her expression would only change to one of anger. this aradia is not the same as the one you remember, the one you remember was apathetic and cold. the Aradia before you is filled with so much emotion and so full of warmth. she is absolutely beautiful.  
"hey feferi are you okay? Is something on your mind?" she asked, worry evident in her voice. You didn't realize you were staring. Your face feels hot.  
"n..no I'm okay, reely! Sorry I just kind of zoned out I guess!" you reassure her quickly and you know she can tell the laugh at the end was forced, but she doesn't press any further.  
"oh well alright then…"  
"so umm how is everyone…in your timeline..?" you weren't sure what to say, so you just asked the first thing that came to you. Why are you so flustered all of a sudden?  
" well most of our friends are dead…karkat, kanaya and terezi are still living though! They're traveling with the humans now."  
"oh…well good for them at least! So why are you not with them..?"  
"I like it better here in the afterlife and I don't think my services are really needed there so..yeah here I am. Besides, all my friends are here, it's not like death changes you much. Theyre still the same. Like you! Even dead, youre still bubbly and pleasant to be around!…I'm really glad you're still the same."  
That last bit seemed kind of like an afterthought, like she wasn't sure if she should have said it or not. Either way the sudden compliment was unexpected.  
"thanks…You're different, you seem much more…lively than the last time I saw you. Well before I died, I've seen plenty of you around, aradiabots mostly. Um it's a nice change from the passive glares i usually receive heh."  
"yeah! I was pretty much done with being dead. I feel great now, I intend to stay alive for good!" she looks determined and you admire her fierce attitude.  
"whale that's wonderful! I have no doubt in my mind that you will." you smiled at her and she grinned back, wide and proud. You feel like she can do anything she sets her mind to, because that's just the kind of person she is. You believe she'll fulfill her purpose and live to enjoy the satisfaction upon completing her goal. You know that after this conversation you'll see her differently. She is no longer the passive pawn, emotionally dead and Unstable. She is confident, alive and hopeful. She is radiant, kind and determined. She is strong and beautiful. You think that in this short amount of time, you might've fallen in love with her. There's just so much about her that's simply amazing and you look forward to hearing more.  
"hey feferi, sorry to say but I should go now, I think ive left sollux alone long enough…poor guys probably been falling all over the place." she laughed and though it was nice to hear, what she said before wasn't. you don't want her to go, there's still so much you want to know. Still So much to talk about.  
"goodbye then, sad to see you go but it was fun! Thanks for stopping by and please do come visit me again! tell sollux i said hi." but it's not like you can keep her there, she has things to do after all.  
"yeah ill tell him. this was nice. I promise I'll come again, if I can find you that is…you know how the bubbles are…" she looked a little sad but smiled nonetheless.  
You hope she keeps her promise.  
Before she left you got up and hugged her, she was surprised at first but soon hugged back.  
The hug was strong, and lasted a little longer than any hug should. You held her in your arms, not wanting to let go, drowning in her scent and briefly running your hand through her soft tangled hair. A content sigh escaped her lips, but then she pulled away all too quickly. You hesitantly let her go and found yourself missing her warmth already.  
Saying one last goodbye, she lingered a bit longer looking unsure of herself. then she turned and started making her way back, leaving you alone to your thoughts once again.  
You found yourself wishing you were alive. You thought life wouldn't be meaningless if you could stand by her side, to be alive is to be with her only you weren't dead, then maybe it could've been.  
But you can still be friends and that's good enough, she can still visit you here and you can pretend you're living. It wouldnt be hard, she made you feel so very much alive today. You wonder when she will visit, how long until she does, you're already anxious and she was just here a moment never thought time mattered until now, when that's all you found yourself thinking about.  
Time does matter though and life isn't meaningless, time is important because only time can tell when you'll see her again and life would mean so much more if you could just spend it with her.


End file.
